This comes from a friend of mine named Tom Allen —
There was this really smart sheep down in Mexico who knew how to make butter and buttermilk.
One night she sneaked across the border and got a job working for a farmer, who set up a roadside stand and told her to try to sell the stuff.
Unfortunately traffic was very heavy and the sight of this sheep making butter and buttermilk was so distracting that naturally there was an accident.
The police investigated and issued the farmer a citation for attempting to make an illegal ewe churn on a busy highway.
joescheets 
Guy went to the dentist because his dentures were deteriorating. The dentist asked him what he ate a lot of. The man replied hollandaise sauce. The dentist said that wasit. The sauce ruins dentures. He said he would make some out of chrome. The man asked why. The dentist said, “You know that there is nothing like chrome for the hollandaise.”
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Love it!
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You guys made me laugh!
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Thx, Debbie! That’s a good thing — a very good thing!
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A man and and his wife and his ever-nagging Mother-in-Law went on vacation to Jerusalem.
While they were there, the MIL passed away. The undertaker told the man, “You can have her shipped to the U.S. for $5,000, or you can bury her here, in the Holy Land, for $150.”
The man thought about it and told the mortician he would just have her shipped home.
The undertaker asked, “Why would you spend $5,000 to ship your MIL home, when it would be wonderful to be buried here and you would spend only $150?”
The man replied…..”A long time ago a man died here…was buried here…and three days later he rose from the dead……I just can’t take that chance.”
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