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Self-Aware or Self-Destructive?

June 4, 2019

Talbot Davis is a colleague and crazy-good tennis player and online friend. He wrote this a couple of Tuesdays ago, and allowed it to be shared here, for which I’m grateful —

TOP FIVE TUESDAY — Top Five Questions To Ask To Grow In Self-Awareness — Self-awareness prevents self-destruction. And a lack of self-awareness hastens it.

I believe that self-awareness contains an essential understanding of how you come across to others — and it can be a thin line indeed between being appealing and annoying.

So here are five questions I ask myself and encourage others to ask of themselves as they grow in self-awareness:


Am I talking too much?

Few things betray a greater lack of self-awareness than dominating a conversation. (Because of my natural wiring, I sometimes have to ask myself in social situations, “am I talking too little and retreating into a shell, always observing and not always interacting?”)


 Am I talking too much about me?

Same as #1 above except with a self-centered twist. Again, this is where I need to exercise great caution … though essentially an introvert, I love being the center of attention. And thus tempted to bring the conversation back to me.


 Am I using humor as a defense

against dealing with weightier matters?

Some people have so much wit that their words carry no weight.


 Do I view my quirks as necessary

for survival and not just for comfort?

Over the last few years, one of our staffers told me that I have gone from concealing my quirks to celebrating them. “Quirks?” you ask. Oh … two pair of socks every day, shaving twice a day, the same lunch menu every day, … on and on and on. Survival? Maybe? Comfort? Absolutely.

Do I realize that if I don’t always get my own way

I might end up with a better life?

Some folks bulldoze their way through meetings, relationships, and rarely have to settle for less than all that they want. Then there are other folks — the ones with friends and contentment.


So let these questions guide you today into self-awareness and away from self-destruction.

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